Sunday, March 12, 2017

Our Days

I am sitting out on our balconey watching the younger 2 boys play in the sandbox.
We moved it from the porch to the balcony last week, and at first I didn't like the change. The balcony railings are big enough for Greystoke to put his head through, which means they require constant supervision in the sandbox, whereas I used to be able to stay inside and get something done.
But having it on the balcony has grown on me as the week progressed. Because....I have to sit outside and supervise them. I have to sit. That isn't such a bad thing.
I am 35 weeks pregnant today. I absolutely cannot believe it. It has barely registered that we are going to have another baby, despite months and months of pregnancy. There just hasn't been time to sit around thinking about it.
But the night before last I was up until 1:30 am tossing and turning with contractions and cramping and back pain, and I suddenly realized....this is happening. I forgot how hard the last several weeks of pregnancy are. It is still too early to go into labor, but I am not at all concerned about that. I have had an irritable constantly contracting uterus with my last 3 pregnancies starting around this time. The midwife told me at my last appointment that it is a sign I am doing too much, and it definitely gets worse on days that I try to act like I am not pregnant....but still. I think it is just an annoying fact about my body. With The Dude, I pretended like it was at least accomplishing something...those 6 weeks of feeling like I am in intermittent early labor. But by now, I have given up thinking that. My babies come late, they barely want to come at all. But my body starts wanting them out early.
But last night I slept better. It was daylight savings time, but when you have small kids and a late church service, you don't lose an hour of sleep, you just lose an hour of your day. It kind of made me feel like I slept in, since it was technically an hour later. This morning I feel better. I got a lot done yesterday, and today can be mostly rest and family time.
The boys are off on Friday from school, so I had been planning a kind of last adventure as a mother of only 3 kids. We were going to go to the Tampa zoo. But I think I decided yesterday that I am not going to be up for driving 5 hours round trip in a day, dragging 3 kids around the zoo by myself, and contracting the entire time from fatigue and dehydration. We all have our limits I suppose. I am going to look around for some fun local things we can do instead. It can just be hard finding something all 3 boys like to do at the same time. Especially when the oldest boy is 8.5 going on 21.
But regardless, we do have a lot of fun coming up to look forward. My best buddy, C, is coming from Wyoming the week after next for 2 days, and in order to enjoy that time as much as possible, we decided to get a hotel room in the same beachside hotel where they are staying with their 4 kids. The kids have never stayed in such a "fancy hotel", and are getting pretty excited about our little staycation, on top of the opportunity to miss a couple days of school to do it.
We've all had cold after cold after cold. It's just that time of year. I am getting another one at the moment, which means I will have been coughing until I gag almost every morning for the past 9 weeks. I have not had this many colds in a row since I can remember. I usually only get about one in a year. But at least we haven't had any terrible fevers or anything. Greystoke seems to have outgrown his ear infections, which is awesome. The Dude is a happy wheezer. It is all I can do to get him to use his inhaler, because his barking cough doesn't seem to bother him in the least.
He turned 6 last week, and 6 is looking awesome on him. Just in the past few weeks he has really mellowed out, gotten extra sweet, developed more self control. Every morning he cries a little about going to school. School is hard for him. But he doesn't throw a fit or refuse to get dressed, he just drags himself sadly out to the car and gives me a hug. He had his 6 year checkup last week and has finally made it past the 5th percentile for his BMI, skinny little guy. He failed his vision screen, which his teacher has been wondering about due to his writing difficulties, and since he wheezes several times a year they want to do pulmonary function testing to see if he has asthma or just a reactive airway. So 2 more appointments to squeeze in on top of my weekly OB appointments before the baby comes.
Because I was bragging about how sweet 6 year old Dude has become, he and Greystoke just got in a sand fight. And now we are headed in to the bath. Break time on the balcony is over.
I have been nesting like crazy still, but glad I have gotten this flurry of activity mostly done, though it will of course never be done, because I am wearing out. Yesterday I got all the baby clothes sorted and washed and put away. I bought a few more outfits at the lamb shoppe. This is the first baby I have really needed to buy things for, and I have been surprised by how fun it has been. There is a lot of pink. Poor thing will probably hate pink. The pink carseat is due in the mail next week.
JT is nesting too. We were told that our air conditioning wouldn't last the summer about 6 months ago, and this week he decided we should just go ahead and replace it now. I am so glad we did. It was a long 9 hour ordeal, and we got to get it over with when the older 2 were mostly in school, it wasn't 95 degrees out (though it was 84, I was pretty hot), and we didn't have to wait 2 days with no AC for them to schedule it. Plus, we also asked them to put a vent in our walk in closet, which we have totally cleared out. Which means, for the very first time, I will bring a baby into the world who has her very own nursery. A small one, yes. But still.
I better get going. Hair is washed and younger 2 went racing down the stairs naked where they are probably interrupting Aquaman's swish swishing through his lego blanket. He is building a log cabin in the woods scene. It's an hour until church, and on Sundays I like to try to play with each kid individually, whatever they want, for 20 minutes each uninterrupted. It doesn't sound like much, but they look so forward to it.
"Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom."
Psalm 90:12
I have been reading the Psalms lately, listening to them on my phone too when I get a few minutes. My journal entries are short. Sometimes one verse, and one thought. It's not much either, but right now it is what I can do, and I so look forward to it.
I am remembering to count my days, as some little silver hairs come in. As the last few weeks of my last pregnancy are upon me. As I find myself so wrapped up in what seems like my own importance.
The grass withers, all that is upon me today, all this splendor, it is falling away.
But this is the day that the Lord has made. This day I will live it.

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